


Sad, Beautiful, Tragic Love Affair

by ZankieForLifeBaby



Category: Big Brother RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-22
Updated: 2015-04-22
Packaged: 2018-03-25 07:28:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 576
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3801961
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ZankieForLifeBaby/pseuds/ZankieForLifeBaby
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sorry, I was in a mood...so I wrote this...I know it doesn't really have a plot...but, it is what it is.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sad, Beautiful, Tragic Love Affair

**Author's Note:**

> The water's high, you're jumping into it  
> And letting go... and no one knows  
> That you cry, but you don't tell anyone  
> That you might not be the golden one  
> And you're tied together with a smile  
> But you're coming undone

The tears were real. They slid down his face, slowly at first, making new tracks over dry skin. Then, they fell faster, taking the same familiar paths over and over again. The tears wandered down around his nose, falling onto his lips. Some gathered at the corners of his mouth, waiting for something, looking for the next path down and away from the eyes from which they sprang.

When he opened his mouth, he could taste the tears. They were salty. It seemed appropriate although he’d never thought about it before. Of course tears should be salty. It made perfect sense.

His eyes burned but he found that he was strangely enjoying it. It felt right. He deserved it. He couldn’t breath well anymore. His nose was now stuffed up, running a little of its own accord. He had to breath through his mouth. The air drying out his throat and leaving him parched. 

He couldn’t move though. He didn’t think he’d ever move from this spot. Sitting, waiting, and watching seemed like his best move now. If he stayed here long enough, maybe he’d come back. Maybe it would all reverse. Maybe this wasn’t real.

Then he felt a tear fall from the tip of his nose, hitting the woven cotton covering his thigh. The spot it left was wet and oddly shaped, not a perfect circle, but oblong and imperfect. He felt the spot with his finger. It was definitely wet. The tears were real. He knew that. He had just hoped, foolishly, that maybe he’d entered some sort of alternate reality.

This reality sucked. What more could he have possibly done? What more did he want? He’d done it all. He’d done everything he’d asked for, but it wasn’t enough. It would never have been enough. He could never do enough, not in a hundred lifetimes. He knew that now. It just sucked that he didn’t learn it until it was too late. 

Although he doubted he’d have walked away any sooner. He didn’t want to walk away now. He loved him. He still loved him. He figured he’d always love him in some way. It was impossible not to. What they’d shared and what he was certain was still there, somewhere, was beautiful. It had been a shining light. Now it was shrouded in darkness with no escape from the suffocating depths. He mused on the idea of it hidden under the surface, untouched, buried, and collecting dust. How long would it stay there? Forever?

Now, the room was swimming around him. Nothing was clear as the tears were pooling in his eyes. He blinked, clearing his vision, feeling the hot tears make their way down, looking for an escape from the despair. He wished he could find that escape too. He needed one, badly. He’d put so much faith in this. He’d held on for dear life. Maybe he’d held on too tight. Maybe that had been the problem.

He tried to fight the images of happier times. Hands held. Kisses shared. Whispers passed. Ears rubbed. Hair caressed. Eyes caught. Bodies touched. Love felt. It all hurt more than he wanted to admit. He wanted to be stronger than that. He didn’t want to linger. He didn’t want to remember. What would be the point anyway? Why remember something that ended?

That’s what it was. It was ended. Over. Done. That was the real problem. It was never supposed to end.


End file.
